Who Did Khloe Kardashian's Makeup?

I don't know if I should berate or congratulate whoever is responsible to the face Khloe Kardashian was showing at a NYC party last night. Seriously- someone let her walk out of her hotel with this amount of brightener, blush and fake eyelashes. I'm not even going to talk about her lips or the fact that girls with not much of a neck should never ever wear turtlenecks.

Photo: Faded Youth Blog

J. Crew wants your bridesmaids to hate you

Aptly named the O'Hara gown, this embossed organza dress ($2200) is the best tool to make your bridesmaids weep, just as the J. Crew model is about to do in the photo.

Photo: jcrew.com

Does Not Compute

The Jersey Shore cast opening the NY Stock Exchange.

Heidi Klum's roots and/or streaky highlights.

Jessica Biel's choice of undergarments.

Heidi Montag backing out of a reality show.

The fact Angelina Jolie has a colorful past is suddenly news. 2001 was not that long ago.

And one for the road: Americans who blind buy bottles of Jennifer Aniston's perfume from UK eBay sellers (and pay through the nose, of course). This fragrance will be in our department stores in a few weeks and at online discounters a couple of months later. Can it be that good? I doubt it?

Photos: I'm Not Obsessed, Socialite Life and The Superficial.

Rihanna in a ruffled polka dot jumpsuit. Really.

Fill in the blank:
In 10 years Rihanna is going to look at these photos and________________________

Photos: Just Jared

Diane Kruger Premiers Really Bad Pants

Proving that even beautiful and usually stylish people can make poor a fashion choice, Diane Kruger wore these unfortunate pants to the Paris premier of her new film Lily Sometimes (here she's photographed with co-star Ludivine Sagnier). The cut, rise, wrinkly fabric and length are painfully unflattering. Her cute Chanel purse and sexy peep-toes deserve better than this.

Photo: Just Jared

Gwen Stefani Reinvents Jeans

If this is the newest thing from L.A.M.B. and certain young people are going to start wearing diaper jeans then we're in for an interesting fashion season. No one, not even Gwen Stefani, can pull of this look. If you have drapy fabric hanging between your legs you're going to look ridiculous, not hot. And pleated jeans are never ever a good idea. Just look at your 80s photos and remind yourself why (hint: they go so well with a Bill Cosby sweater).

Photo: Dlisted

Nicolas Cage had a bad hair day at WonderCon

During the Passover Seder last week there was a funny discussion among the men of the family, who are all in various stages of losing their hair. The topic was how they knew it was time to let go and shave whatever was left of their former blond glory. The conclusion was it's time when one's wife says so.

Apparently, Nicolas Cage's wife isn't doing her job.

Photo: Dlisted.

According to IFRA, you can't read or understand this post

The Scented Salamander features an interview with Stephen Weller, Director of Communications for IFRA. You can read the whole thing here and do some headdesking. Marie-Helene Wagner asked the million dollar question:

Could you explain to us why IFRA and the perfume industry have set their preferences on perfume reformulation rather than warning labels as in the food industry? If we take inspiration from the pharmaceutical industry, why not deliver perfumes with allergenic ingredients in a controlled manner, again with warnings and perhaps even prescriptions? Fragrances are routinely sold in pharmacies. One would just need a step-up of this circuit of distribution.

Here's the bottom line of the answer:

This is one approach to help inform the consumer to make a choice. However, not all consumers read labels or indeed understand the information on the label. Therefore, IFRA Standards are needed to help reduce the incidents of sensitisation to certain materials. Experience shows that labelling alone does not have the desired effect.

I don't know about you, but reading this makes me incredibly angry. I need a stiff drink. Maybe absinthe laced with oakmoss.

The Death Of Good Taste

Chanel's email newsletter this morning announced the coming release of Les Trompe-L'Oeil de Chanel, a range of (brace yourselves) temporary tattoos depicting "iconic Chanel symbols and codes".

Basically, someone at Chanel is really embracing the Heidi Montags of the world and other brilliant thinkers who love sporting commercial logos directly on their bodies. At least when celebs do it they either get paid or get expensive accessories for free. The rest of us are expected to pay for the privilege of adorning ourselves with this crap.

Photo of Mademoiselle Chanel and a model from myvintagevogue.com

Beauty And Fashion At The L.A. Premier Of 'Nine'

Sarah Silverman is someone I desperately try to like and for various reasons that start with Jimmy Kimmel and end with her fashion sense, always fail miserably. I get that some people really don't care and are unwilling to put in any effort. I have my thoughts on it, but I can respect their choice. What I really dislike is when certain people go out of their way to not look good. Sarah Silverman is usually a prime example. The above was her look for the premier of Nine in Los Angeles. For comparison, Here's Penelope Cruz at the same event. Gorgeous, as always:

Then again, there was also Nicole Kidman defying logic, but at this point I'm about ready to give up on her:

Photos: Socialite Life

Fill In The Blank

I want to smell like Pamela Anderson because________________

Photo: The Superficial

A Thousand Words

Lindsay Lohan and Donatella Versace at the Whitney Museum's Gala in NYC last night.

Photo: Dlisted

Lindsay Lohan At 23

Lindsay Lohan celebrated her 23rd birthday last month. This is what she looked like when hosting a party at the Revolve flagship store in West Hollywood last night.

Sad.


Photo: Socialite Life

What Would Heather Say?

Winona Ryder is an 80s nightmare. I tried to decide what's the worst part of this outfit. My vote goes for the shoes. What do you think?

photo: Socialite Life

Five Things We Can Live Without

1. Lady GaGa- All of a sudden Posh Beckham looks like a role model.

1.Ed Hardy- This tattoo-inspired line was cool about five years ago but jumped the shark even before Madonna started wearing it in public. Nothing is more pathetic than adults wearing this label from head to toe. And the perfume sucks, too.

3. Fashion and beauty "recession advice" geared to make us buy lots and lots of cheap crap.

4. Horribly scripted "reality" TV. The Real Housewives of NYC used to be a sweet spot of guilty pleasure, but it's so awfully done with the staged conflicts and the abrasive personalities I'm finding it hard to justify watching it even while sweating on the elliptical.

5. Reviving the worst trends from the 80s. You know how most of us look at photos of ourselves from 1985 and ask "What the hell was I thinking?" ? I have loved Kristen Bell since the first episode of Veronica Mars, but this look is too godawful for words.


Images: Dlisted and I'm Not Obsessed.

The Spirit Of Fashion Victims Past

Scarlett Johansson, July 2007:


Posh Beckham, April 2008:


Spring 2009, according to Bergdorf Goodman, all of us (click to enlarge):


Just say no.


Images: Posh from the Daily Mail, Scarlett from The Superficial, fashion from BergdorfGoodman.com. Left ($1695) and center ($1095) by Stella McCartney. The one on the right is by Vince ($325).

The Oldest Mistake In The Book

I was working on the opening paragraph for tomorrow's post, Most Common Makeup Mistakes when I got distracted by the photo above. See, my point was how despite the recycled periodic article on this subject most magazines tend to run when they're out of something new to say, we all know better, so some atrocities are now extinct. Like wearing a lip liner darker than your lipstick.

It looks like Jessica Simpson really wants us to notice her new collagen lips. I have no other explanation for this. At first I thought it might be a bad angle or shading, but The Superficial has a whole bunch of pictures showing more of the same. Apparently, Jess doesn't read enough beauty advice.

Maybe I should reconsider tomorrow's post. Or at least add a few immortal suggestions like avoiding the clown cheek look or a discussion about the importance of blending.

Let's Start The Week On The Right Foot

I don't have the right to make fun of the hair, because that was my hair style in 1986 (I was 15 and it was the eighties. We were allowed to look stupid). But the story here is the shoes. Can you imagine the agony?

Images: Dlisted

In Her Shoes

I know this is probably not the best way to start your week, but on the other hand, why not have a good laugh?

Posh is bringing being a fashion victim to a new level while promoting the latest Beckham perfume. I don't want to know how her feet smell inside whatever it is that she's wearing.

Photo: A Socialite's Life

Mrs. Roper Called...

She wants her muumuu back.

Photo: Dlisted.